129A

Well, I am happy to report that I did in fact survive the cosmic chaos of March!

I’m still on the hill that Mercury retrograde had a whole fucking lot to do with it, but thankfully Mercury will sort it self out come April 7th. In addition to this, I found out that Venus has been in retrograde this whole time as well… so yeah. Good news though, she will be back to her usual self on April 12th and I love that for me. I am beyond ready for spring to take hold, let the rain come in and wash me clean or whatever Hilary said.

Despite the oddities and all overness of March, there were definitely high points that were astounding!

One thing that I made an absolute priority was taking myself out for things I would usually side step because saving money is on my overall to-do list for the year. I figured if I am trying to be more organized with my finances that it would be okay to budget out some money (and time) to take myself out solo or with friends. I had a solo date night at The Bellewether on a random Tuesday because steak just sounded so fucking delicious. I ended up ordering crab cakes, steak, a side salad, and bread pudding… all of which I very proudly ate every single morsel of! Then that weekend I went to The Polite Society with a friend of mine for a girls brunch to catch up before she left for New Zealand for three weeks.

I also ventured out to try a new coffee spot! Now keep in mind that I am a habitual person; once I find a coffee shop, deli, crystal store, mechanic, etc. I stick to that spot because I like consistency. It was long overdue to push myself out of my comfort zone, so I did. Plus, it was a great excuse to head over to World Market to look for cotton napkins and curtains.

There was also a fresh tasting box order from The Benton Park Baker, hot yoga, chakra release, and thrifting that got woven into the second half of the month. Hot yoga was a first for me and it is not for the weak! Those yogis were fucking getting it, I was so impressed by them and 100% inspired to keep up with the practice. I also had one spot on my back that was insistent on sweating for about 3 hours after class was over; I went ahead and did a little research only to find out that my heart chakra was purging what was no longer needed and releasing the blockages so I could heal from the trauma. When I initially read the explanation I was a bit shooketh as there were some intrusive thoughts I had while in flow, but a friend had told me prior to class that when that happens to keep in mind that it is a trauma needing to be sweat out. While I was slightly annoyed with the endless sweating post class and shower, I was immensely grateful for the purging of blockages.

Amidst all the fabulous, fun activities I curated for myself I also had to get some adult shit done. It was as boring as I expected it to be – you know, your typical DMV/plates/tags runaround and wait game – BUT it went by much faster than I expected. A much deserved thank you goes to me from last summer that sat down and finally organized all of the important documents so that I wouldn’t be stressed when this time came for me because I knew exactly where all the paperwork I needed was located (which is usually the worst part of the process for me).

Work kept me on my toes and the cannabis industry tea stays hot af; most days it feels like living in a reality television show. I thought at almost three years in I would be less surprised by the plot twists, but that was a lie. Although, a big win for the cannabis industry was that our STL Cannamoms were featured on a CNN piece; like CNN flew out from New York to St. Louis to meet the cannamoms and interview the founder, Kimberlee. THEN Fox did what, I think, was supposed to be a debate piece but ultimately ended up being two women condescendingly ganging up on Kim. What we all thought was going to be a friendly back and forth about mothers using cannabis, as opposed to alcohol, to help decompress and keep the mothers sane as they raise their babies up ultimately turned out to be these women reinforcing the stigma while making Kim out to be some charity case. Kim handled herself with such grace, provided facts and well thought points to refute some of the accusations thrown her way. My favorite part was at the end when the host asked Kim if she had anyone in her life “to wrap their arms around” Kim or a church group she could talk to, to which Kim informed the women that she and her pastor were brainstorming ideas on a cannabis bible study group… the host basically ran off the air! It was hilarious! I was definitely proud of how Kim held herself and represented all of us cannamoms here in the St. Louis area. Truly, it is already hard enough and moms who drink alcohol get a free fucking pass because drinking around children is normalized even though it’s probably one of the WORST influences a parent can put, either directly or indirectly, in front of their child. So yeah, Kim is a total badass and I am proud to know her!

I spent the last weekend of the month treating myself to all of my favorite things; delicious food, great company, and Forest Park. I woke up early on Sunday to get going on the day, I wanted to do as much as possible. I started by meeting another incredible friend of mine for brunch at The Biscuit Joint before they had to go to work. The Biscuit Joint is hands down my favorite restaurant in St. Louis; the food is mind blowing (and all made in house), the vibes are always top tier, they are community focused, and the team running the show always has the warmest energy towards everyone who comes in. These guys treat each guest like they have been regulars for years and can easily put the biggest smile on your face while you are enjoying a bombass plate of food.

After brunch I took a solo trip to the art museum. It wasn’t planned, but the flow towards the park felt right. I was already going to meet another friend at the history museum for their new exhibit that afternoon and had plenty of time to kill ahead of it. I ended up only spending time on the first floor because I was so inspired while looking at the different pieces that I had to sit and start writing. It was comforting in a lot of ways to just move at my own pace and kind of linger amongst the various pieces. I have loved the art museum since I was a little girl and always thought when I grew up that I would spend every free minute I had in life at the museum. That definitely didn’t happen, but damn did it feel good to make it happen for myself. It felt like a win for little Amanda!

I managed to squeeze in some time to lay on Art Hill before meeting at the history museum. The rain let up for a little while and the overcast made everything you could see from the hill look stunning; the blue/grey tones were the perfect backsplash to a very colorful view. Once I got to the history museum I was immediately engulfed by all the exhibits that were open; the PRIDE and 1904 World’s Fair exhibits were at the top of our list though. Both were awe-inspiring and stirred more curiosity within me.

St. Louis already has a fuck ton of lore surrounding it, a multitude of underground tunnels, and The Arch is sus as fuck (go up there and look down to the old courthouse building and tell me what you see, look at the shapes… SUS!). Personally, I think much about the origins of our city “disappeared” after the 1904 World’s Fair AND the fairs were done nationally with some form of disaster happening shortly after the end/tear-down of the fair itself in each of these cities. IT’S WEIRD GUYS AND WE SHOULD ALL LOOK INTO IT! Sorry, let me calm down for a sec.

Overall, both of those retrogrades and a few haters tried to come for me but damn did I keep it moving on faith all while taking care of me. I have to say, I am proud of myself! I went looking for peace, found just that, as well as a few answers as to what is going on with this journey of mine.

The plot twists never fail to entertain me, now to see what April has in store…